so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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