we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
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