Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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