Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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