We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
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You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
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He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
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