hell yes lets make some ravioli
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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