cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
