Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
