so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
