He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
