can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
