I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
