Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
