there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize