Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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