I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
