windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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