absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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