you guys were way drunker than both of me
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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