i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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