i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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