you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
