He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
