Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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