Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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