Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize