Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
