so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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