you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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