can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
