My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
