Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
