you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
smell my finger.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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