Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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