He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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