I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
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Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
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He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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