i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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