So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
