I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
