so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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