And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
