pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.