In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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