He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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