i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Floor bacon is actually really good
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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