dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize