Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
