Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize