So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?