Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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