don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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