he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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